Skateboarding is so much fun. The wind is in your hair and you can get just about anywhere by moving your legs. Wait, that sounds like work. That can’t be fun. Use the Electric Skateboard to skateboard without the physical nonsense regular skateboarding involves.
Stop playing with your pets! Pets are so needy. They want food, water and they have the nerve to expect you to entertain them. But there’s a marathon of your favorite show on tonight and there’s no way you are going outside to play. So use the Auto Ball Launcher to throw balls for your pet and you will be off the hook. If only it would ...
Friends not required! If you are lacking in the friends department, you can still get in some exercise. Shoot baskets and have them easily returned to you. You won’t have to worry about losing. Without friends, you always score the most baskets!
Have a fancy car! Even if your car lacks power windows and heated seats, you can still look like it costs a lot of money. Your car doesn’t even need to have doors for the Windshield Display GPS to work. But you should probably focus on getting doors instead of a fancy GSP system, just saying….
Car insurance is expensive but how else are you going to be able to drive out to the middle of the woods and sleep willingly in a mosquito infested habitat? With the Volkswagen Bus Camping Tent of course! While you may be protected from bears and other wildlife, prepare for a group of hippies to show up offering free hugs.
Never lose your beach ball again! Too many times we lose a beach ball at the beach because it quietly rolls across the smooth sand and ends up in the ocean. With the Gigantic Beach Ball, you will hear the screams of women and children as it rolls past them, crushing their picnic lunches. This will give you plenty of time to grab it before it is ...
Stay clean! Use this kit for when you have to use a public bathroom. Comes with a toilet seat cover, gloves and antiseptic wipes. Would now be a good time to mention that hotel bedspreads, ATM machines and purses are technically dirtier than a toilet seat? Germs are freaking everywhere!
Did you know that swimming uses almost all of your muscles? No thanks! With the Underwater Scooter, you can move through the water effortlessly as it pulls you along. The fish will be really jealous! It’s not your fault they haven’t invented their own scooter yet.
Be prepared! Sure, a small knife and tweezers are great to have on you at all times. But what about when you need a chain rivvet setter, cap lifter, corkscrew, double-cut wood saw with ruler, 3 types of Flat head screwdrivers and a nail file? And that’s only before breakfast! You need the Ultimate Swiss Army Knife then to take care of ...
Give your kids nightmares! How else are you going to get the ready for real life? Every kid should be forced into the jaws of a shark and kept there for 8-10 hours. This is the only way they will make it into college.
Make the sun work for you! The sun is so lazy. It just hangs out in the sky and disappears overnight. So annoying. With this solar cooker, you can finally make the sun do something for you. If it won’t clean the house or walk the dog, make it cook you a burger!